As the long Winter nights start drawing in and our thoughts turn towards Christmas our thoughts can’t help but be drawn to memories of those who are no longer with us; and it is because we miss our departed loved ones so dearly that the Catholic Church has set aside November as the month of the Holy Souls.

Despite the life to come being the whole focus of our Christian journey and physical death being the one absolute certainty in life, none of us are ever really prepared for our own departure. So too the loss of someone whom we have cherished serves as a sharp reminder of mortality, but also of God’s promise of eternal life.

It is for this reason that the Church commends us to pray for those who have gone before us, that God may be merciful to them as they journey from life to their eternal reward. In the earliest days of Christianity there was little talk of Purgatory, and no biblical basis for it. In the Book of 2 Timothy St Paul offers a prayer for a deceased friend, but it is not until several centuries later that Tertullian – the father of Christian theology – makes specific reference to the recitation of public prayers for the dead.

Over subsequent centuries the Catholic Church has come to understand that in the transition between our earthly life and finally coming face-to-face with the overwhelming divinity of God there must be some state whereby souls can have time to reflect on their weaknesses and sinful actions. This place of cleansing and preparation where repentance is done for sinful actions has come to be called Purgatory. The Councils of Florence (1431-49) and Trent (1545-63) acknowledged that even the purest human person who has been able to prepare themselves fully for their passing will retain some connection to past faults, so all but the greatest of saints must undergo some degree of preparation and purification before attaining Heaven.

This is why the Church begins the month of November with All Saints Day and All Souls Day, during which we can remember our departed loved ones, and pray for their heavenly redemption throughout the month. We also shouldn’t forget those who have departed this life but have no-one to pray for them; beyond this earthly realm we are all one family of souls in search of redemption and the loving arms of our creator.

Pope St John XXIII once wrote that “The devotion to the memory of the dead is one of the most beautiful expressions of the Catholic spirit”, because he understood that displaying respect and concern for the death is no morbid preoccupation, but a celebration of both the joys that our loved one’s brought to us through their lives with us, and Christ’s promise of eternal life. It was this profound promise that Jesus made during his last agonising moments on the Cross, not just for the two criminals who were dying either side of him, but for all of humanity.

For some Christians the Crucifixion, and Christ’s death for all our sins, has wiped the slate clean for all subsequent time, but The Catholic Church sees redemption not as a moment but as a process – a journey we all have to undertake if we are to follow Christ to our eternal reward.

For those loved ones who have gone before us, who have entered into the second phase of their divine journey, they are now connected to all the saints in Heaven and to the ultimate promise of God’s infinite love, but they are not beyond our human love and support. Those in Purgatory cannot pray for themselves and need our prayers to speed their journey, just as it is believed that they too will be able to pray for us when our day comes to leave this world. So in a deeply spiritual and profoundly loving way we are still connected by the threads of prayer to those we have loved – they are not forgotten and they will not forget us in turn.

As the Catechism tells us, Purgatory is no punishment of the damned, but a final purification of those who will eventually attain the beatific vision of God. Thus as we contemplate our departed loved ones in pray throughout this month, we should not sink into regrets and despair, rather celebrate their memory and sing of the many good things they did in life. That is useful prayer just as much as the wringing of our breast, which during this month we ought to reserve for the contemplation of our own earthly failings.

It was perhaps this thought that was in the mind of St Paul when he wrote his moving prayer blessing for his dear friend Onesiphorous: “May the Lord show mercy to the household of Onesiphorus, because he often refreshed me and was not ashamed of my chains. On the contrary, when he was in Rome, he searched hard for me until he found me. May the Lord grant that he will find mercy from the Lord on that day! You know very well in how many ways he helped me in Ephesus” (2 Timothy 1:16–18).

Although this is just the briefest of anecdotes from early Christian history, St Paul’s loving eulogy reveals the beating heart of Christian solidarity, of human love and the promise of God’s eternal reward. It also comes down the centuries as a profound reminder of the importance of remembrance of the dead, and the celebration of the good that was in their lives. St Paul is telling us that God hears the prayers that we say for our departed loved ones.

In Catholic churches around the world during this month there will be many opportunities to give thanks for the lives of our departed loved ones, and to pray for their safe journey homeward. In such moments of reflection we ought also to remind ourselves of our own mortality, and of what lies ahead for us as we travel joyfully and eventually to meet those who have gone before us.

Joseph Kelly

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Every November the Carmelite Friars at Chilswell Priory near Oxford open their Priory Golden Book of the Holy Souls; inscribed in it are the names of departed parents, relations, friends and all for whom you wish the friars to pray. This beautiful book is left at the foot of the altar in the priory chapel and your intentions are prayed for at every Eucharistic sacrifice of the Mass throughout the month. Adding the names of your loved ones is done through as very simple online form and is completely free of charge, though many do choose to make a small offering in thanks.

If you would like to add names of your departed loved ones to the Priory’s Golden Book of the Holy Souls, just go to :

https://www.carmelite.uk.net/online-talks-retreats/remembering-our-departed/